“You are like an oak but God is making you into a willow.” Not the words a young wife and mom would welcome hearing from their mother-in-law. But indeed, my mother-in-law (whom I loved) was right.
I have a strong constitution; I know what I believe and I stand firm in it, and I know in whom I believe. I have a clear sense of right and wrong/true and false, strong convictions, and deep love and devotion to family and friends with whom I share healthy relationships (mutually caring, honest and respectful). But I’m also very not perfect. My mother-in-law, others, and I recognize my strengths and limitations.
It’s easy to be strong, confident, bold, and firm when life is going the way you think it should or want it to, but when the hard and cold winds of life blow, it will be the oak branch most likely to snap. The willow will bend and bow.
In the process of “life” (embracing a son with special needs: cerebral palsy, mental challenges, epilepsy and who’ll always be with us, the death of 5 family members within 10 years, and various “life” situations) were stormy winds to help me learn to bow instead of break. I learned, in the midst of many life challenges that I needed to become more like the willow if I wanted to survive the storms. The willow surrenders to the wind; the oak gives up and quits.
Most people I’ve talked to don’t particularly like the storms of life, but seem to be thankful for them. Lessons learned get us through (not necessarily “over”) the challenges and heartache. It takes time, but we learn it’s better to bend and bow in surrender to the Lord than to snap and quit. And the interesting thing: we’re always being tested to see if we’ll surrender or quit.
Are you more like the oak or the willow?